Permanent Change, More Freedom

I’m somebody who’s tried many types of therapy over my lifetime. I’m 48 years old and have been using the EMDR process for about 5 years. I tried it based on a recommendation from a friend. With just regular talk therapy, I found that its effect wore off over time and I wanted something that would impact my life more. I use EMDR now in combination with talk therapy and have been more satisfied with how quickly and thoroughly I process through things in my life. Also, I find that the benefits of a session with EMDR are permanent, like taking off layers and having more freedom to move in my life. What worked immediately for me with EMDR was having my eyes closed and being able to use my strong visual sense. I could envision scenes, people, even colors and textures, to help me get in touch with what was bothering me. I could also exaggerate scenes to play out in a dramatic way to get to the root of the behavior I was reacting to. For example, once a woman was upset with me and in my mind she became huge, bigger than a house, and loomed over me. I felt really small. What was interesting near the end of that session was that I spontaneously became very big when I went back to the original scene after processing my memories associated with that scene! I use the tappers (alternating vibrating theratappers) in my EMDR and love the feeling my brain gets when they’re on. I can feel my left-brain, then my right brain, respond to the alternating buzzing. It goes back and forth with the tappers on. If I feel stuck when I’m trying to process something, I just stop trying so hard, relax and let the “magic” happen with the tappers - soon I’m back on track. I’ll never forget one session that changed the course of my life for the better, and I’m still in awe of the power of the mind! In my memory of my childhood house, I associated fear with crossing the threshold into my sisters’ bedroom. Stepping into their room was like stepping off into a dark abyss. I bravely made that step, with the tappers on, and found that it did have a bottom and, in fact, walls. I soon realized that I felt like I was inside a chimney, very black with soot. I was confused until I suddenly remembered that there had been a fire in my sisters’ bedroom, caused by a crack in the chimney! What an “aha” moment that was for me, as I would have been very young when that happened, probably pre-verbal. My guess is that my mom was holding me as a baby and peering down into the chimney, from my sisters’ room, to see the damage. I must have looked down it too and been terrified by what I saw! Clearing that memory made a significant impact in my life in the following weeks by removing a big layer of fear, just a generalized fear that I didn’t even know I was carrying. I regard that EMDR session 4 or so years as a major turning point in my life, and continued EMDR has only helped me more.Read more EMDR success stories